Young Adult

First of all let me establish that I really liked this movie. It was well-written, well acted and was somehow just really profound for me. But I know that many will be disappointed by it and some will probably even hate it.
Most of all it's because Jason Reitman and Diablo Cody are the team that brought us Juno. Reitman was nominated for an Oscar for that film and Cody won the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. cody went on to dabble in horror comedy writing Jennifer's Body and also the acclaimed series The United States of Tara.  Juno dealt with having to grow up, finding your first love and all the trials and tribulations of life and highschool. Young Adult deals with the same sort of issues but in a decontructed, less sweet way. In this film there is no Kimya Dawson, the cute as a button presence that is Ellen Paige is replaced by a very tired looking, bitchy Charlize Theron and while it was endearing to see a youthful Juno having to grow up all of a sudden its  a bit different seeing a 37 year old woman still stuck in a highschool mindset.

In Young Adult, Charlize plays Mavis Gray, a ghost-writer for a series of teen novels called Waverly High that is soon going to be cancelled. After her divorce she has an epiphany and decides to go back to her hometown to reclaim the 'love of her life' Buddy Slade (played by Patrick Wilson) who is both happily married and a new dad. I was never a huge Charlize Theron fan but in this film she is incredible. I think it must be one of the most difficult things to play a completely unlikeable character but she does it so well. Mavis Gray is a shallow, drunk, purposeless woman living in the shadow of her highschool days. The film is so subtle in its exploration of this character. We see her nervousness and anxiety when she keeps picking at her hair, yet ironically she won 'best hair' in highschool. There are hilarious moments in the film which is evidence of Charlize's excellent comic timing.
The film is written really well because its both funny and tragic. Like The Descendants it makes use of that border between comedy and drama. As Mavis goes on her own personal journey she is also writing the final book in the series of Waverly High so we see how her reality is translated into fiction but also how she blurs the lines of what is real-life and what only happens in the movies. At one point Mavis shouts out to an old classmate who's trying to convince her not to go through with her plan to break up Buddy Slade's marriage, "Don't you know love conquers all?!!!" Her naivety is indicitive of her limbo-like state of maturity.

You're either going to love Young Adult or hate it. Personally I thought it was awesome.

Kavady 2012

It's difficult to explain what the Kavady is to those who aren't familiar with it or have never experienced it before. The Tongaat Kavady is reputed to be the biggest in the Southern Hemisphere. I grew up going to Kavady every single year and it became commonplace to me. However I haven't been able to for a few years, in the interim I have become more analytical and more cynical. I don't think I ever accepted religion completely but I didnt question things when I was a child. That's changed now and I think I look at things as more of an observor.

Kavady is basically a sacrifice both mentally and physically that people choose to do as penance or  in hope of being doled out goodness by the God Muruga. The Kavady refers to the wooden structures, metal milk urns and fairly enormous chariots that people carry or pull. To carry Kavady means that you have to abstain from meat for a number of days and put absolute faith in what you believe in. On the day of the Kavady the communal field at the centre of Tongaat is filled with people. The absolute middle of the field is taken up by a ring of devotees who all have their groupies. Each Kavady carrier has their own band of musicians who play drums and symbols around them with hypnotic beats which get them into a trance. They are then pierced with hooks that carry limes, marigolds, sometimes heavy gold urns yet somehow they don't bleed or even scar, their skin doesnt even tear despite the heaviness of these objects. At the epicentre of all this is the big chariot which is pulled by many devotees through the town, here people take milk and fruit and pray for any past miseries or future wants.

The chariot leaves the field approximately 20 minutes after the announced time, as is Indian time. The main road is blocked off by the police as firstly the main chariot is pulled down the road where it then makes a sharp right turn to the temple. Thereafter the devotees carrying Kavady who arent in a trance go through, then the devotees who are in a trance dance or run down the road, this is usually a pretty scary sight for children because they are heavily pierced and totally involved in the music around them however I realise now that while they might be in a transcendental state they are most certainly in their senses because somehow they all manage to turn right and go to the temple instead of running straight down the road to Westbrook beach. After this is the last lot of people but by far the scariest. The last lot are people who pull chariots with hooks attached to their back. For me this is incredible, they run and the chariot even goes over pot holes and bumps and yet their skin doesnt tear, its really incredible!

The Kavady is definitely a specatacle and there's nothing wrong with that. I often question the blind faith that people have and wonder how they are able to believe so fully in something. Hinduism like most other religions is a religion of guilt,the Kavady seems to cleanse people of that guilt through their sacrifice and in some ways I think theres nothing wrong with that. Sometimes I wish I could accept all these things without question so that life could be simpler. But one instance sticks in my mind. The day before Kavady I went shopping at the pooja shop (prayer shop) with my granny. On the wall was a checklist of what to buy for the seven fairies prayer that is also done around this time. First of all the idea of having a checklist of totally random things worries me, who decides what you need? and what significance do those things have? the other thing that worries me is that when I questioned my granny about why she does this prayer she said "Because otherwise aunty yogie will get sick" But why? "Because when she was 15 she fainted in the middle of three crossroads so it was definitely the seven fairies that did it" My granny doesnt know who or what the seven fairies are but she appeases them anyway for fear that my aunt will get sick and my aunt has totally convinced herself that this is true, in fact she's had a fever for five days that miracuously went away today after they did the prayer.

I just can't bring myself to believe these things about the religion I grew up with. And thats why I've come to seperate religion and culture. My culture includes things like Kavady, which is a coming together of the entire community. For just one day it's like going back in time. No matter how much things change the basis of these rituals stay the same, I always saw this as a bad thing but I know it makes me feel happy to be part of a community, it makes me feel astounded to see the level of devotion many people have. Indians who grew up in Tongaat come from all over the world on Kavady day and for one day its like you're a child again, if you never felt like you belonged to your home town on this one day you feel like your home town and the people in it belong to you. To be part of the writhing crowd and hear the vibrations of thablas and symbols in the air is an experience that words cannot even describe and photos can't do justice to.

31 Million Reasons

When my parents forced me to watch 31 million reasons I was sure I was in for a long, bad quality, wannabe movie. I'm actually pleasantly suprised because the production values are international standard and the acting is pretty good. Jack Devnarain is definitely far too posh and will forever only ever be seen as Rajesh from Isidingo no matter how much muscle mass he gains but he is a good actor and very compelling.
The story is really intense and very entertaining. I love the fact that the Indian accents and idiosyncratic behaviour wasn't toned down for a wider audience. This is possibly one of the few movies I've seen apart from Bollywood and Harold and Kumar that contains token white people.

31 million Reasons is based on a novel that's based on the true story of two cop brothers who rob a securty company for 31 million rand. What follows is the story of how they are eventually apprehended.
I laughed a lot in this movie mostly because of the Indian private jokes but it was also really suspenseful and in some ways sad. I didnt expect to like this movie but now I really recommend it. John Barker is a brilliant director. He's most commonly known for his comedic work, and I thought he would forever only be known for Pure Monate as much of the Pure Monate cast are however he's done a really good job with this film. When he spoke to my film class years agohe mentioned that he was passionate about Durban as a location and now I realise that he's shown off Durban really well in this film.

At this point I'm just really proud of South African film in general. There was a time where it was almost a bit embarrassing to admit that you liked SA film and people couldnt really look over the bad sound and filming quality. But I think now that the quality has vastly improved and people arent scared to tell uniquely South African stories.

Snake and Seal Massacre in 3D!

Yesterday I watched Piranha in 3D and today I went on a roadtrip to Hartebeespoort Dam. Those two elements combined have led me to create my idea for the most successful SA horror movie of all time!

Let me first explain Hartebeespoort Dam...
Hartebeespoort is a playground for the upper-middle class sector of Gauteng society who frequent this random paradise with their yachts, jet-skis and Harley Davidsons. This makes it the perfect place for an abomination of nature massacre to occur.
 There is actually a snake and seal show in Hartebeespoort, as unlikely as that sounds as well as a petting zoo where one of the animals that you can pet is 'reptiles'.
The premise of this film will be that somehow (I haven't worked that out yet) both enraged snakes and zombie seals will escape from their tanks and wreak havoc on the town of Hartebeespoort.Its not safe on the dam and its even more dangerous on land. There is no escape! And God forbid you try to drive away from the town because the signs are so confusing and the petrol attendants so bad at giving directions that you will just end up back where you started, between a seal and a hard place!

These are the absolutely essential elements that need to be in the movie.
1. The movie needs to be shot in 3D
2. The opening scene will include a blonde couple called Jaco and Katrien stopping at a petrol station where they will be given free popcorn as this seems to be the general marketing ploy of garages in Hartebeespoort.
3. Samuel L. Jackson will play a US Marshall with a dark past that was sent specifically to Hartebeespoort to apprehend a Ugandan warlord who has been hiding in the town ever since his face was broadcast on YouTube. He just happens to be in the area when the massacre goes down.
4. There needs to be lots of gore and blood and also very many gratuitous sex scenes.
5. Kim Kardashian will play a beautiful yet somehow 'brilliant' marine biologist and  seal expert who uncovers that toxic waste has turned these majestic creatures into killing machines.
6 There has to be a slow motion scene of an enormous seal clapping its hands and going "Arp! Arp!" before it slays an entire boat load of screaming teenagers.
7. Right at the end of the movie Morgan Freeman will renew his role as Nelson Mandela for a brief cameo.

Private Benjamin

I really don't want to play to the stereoptype of girls liking girl-power movies but I really, really love Private Benjamin so much!
I watched it again recently with my dad, who seems like an ulikely suspect to watch this kind of movie with but he's the best feminist I know.
I really don't like Goldie Hawn, she seems to play the same character in every single movie, which is always dictated by her never-changing hair colour.
In this movie she is perfect. She has perfect comic timing, and her acting is spot-on.
In a way she is type cast. Hawn plays Judy Benjamin, a spoilt debutante who is constantly seeking her father's approval. Her greatest ambition in life is to have a huge mansion and a professional husband but when things don't go quite as planned she decides to do something drastic and joins the US army.
Along the way she proves to everyone that she's not just pretty face, she rises in the ranks of the army and becomes ambitious and powerful. Eventually she is again faced with the decision of marriage and security versus her need to succeed as a woman.

I think that it's a completely relevant movie, it was made during the eightees but it makes you think...
have things really changed all that much?
Women are still struggling with decisions like this everyday. As much as we're now brought up to want careers theres still a niggling feeling, in the back of your mind that maybe you do need to be a domestic goddess after all. It's like you have two choices either you work towards your career and everything else takes a backseat or you get married young and have three kids and a dog by the time you're 25. There is no middle ground!

At the end of the movie, when Goldie Hawn walks down a wet, muddy path in full wedding regalia to the sound a military drum roll its powerful and emotional. It's ranked as one of the funniest movies of all time but it also hits you hard in a dramatic way. The best comedies are the ones that also reach you on a dramatic level.

Midrand-Home of the access code

Today I went to visit my midly estranged uncle in Midrand.
I say mildy estranged because Indian people don't really believe in being fully estranged, its like having 'half a cup' of tea. Even if you truly dislike someone in your family you don't really ever say it to their face. You use excuses like German measles, horrific car accident and stolen phone until finally you're caught unawares one day and have to actually go visit them.

Driving into Midrand is like driving into another world that shouldnt even classified as being part of Johannesburg. It is a community dumped into the middle of nowhere. There is literally a savannah surrounding their most popular shopping centre. And everyone lives in gated communities! There are no stand alone houses! You drive on roads that are almost swallowed up by the dust and sand of the numerous construction sites of more and more and more apartments and complexes.

And the thing that Midrand is most famous for is its use of the access code. One needs an access code, given to you by the residents, to enter and one to exit otherwise you will surely be sent packing. For once I was prepared with the code, so we skipped the line of visitors who were getting their car boots checked by the security guards, God forbid we snuck in some contraband cupcakes. I pulled right up to the residents entrance hit the code and drove my dusty Hyundai Getz through the gates while I disgruntled guard tried to stop me. It was so crystal-clear that my car and I didnt belong in this pseudo-African palace/Bali-resort style housing community. I mean, as I told my cousin, that very morning my dad ripped off the plastic skiriting that was falling off the underside of my car, and used it to clean the cobwebs of the ceiling.

Either way I'm glad I live in the real world and not in Midrand.

Accidental Interventional

This week I had the absolute worst allergy of my entire life. Out of nowhere my skin got tomatoe-red and insanely itchy. I couldnt stop scratching and the itching got so bad I started to cry and whimper "Why is this happening to me?!".

To make matters worse no one believed that I had a proper medical condition because this situation happened to coincide with me having my first whole joint in about three months. So my friends and sister all thought I was on some kind of stoned trip and freaking out.

They decided to stage some kind of an intervention. It started off ok, with my sister sitting on the edge of my bed saying comforting things like, "It's going to be ok, you didnt have that much" and "It's ok to say no" But as the itching got worse I really did start freaking out because no one was helping me!
My dizziness because of my allergy was misinterpreted as me almost passing out. From there things escalated as my friend started shouting," She's going to peel her skin off like a naartjie!!!" as she threw me into a cold shower.I'm sure she was entirely convinced that she was doing God's work.

In the end the shower actually really helped with my burning skin. It was difficult to sleep with three concerned heads talking over me about whether they needed to drive to the hospital or rehab but eventually I dropped off and all was forgotten. Atleast now I know that should I ever have a substance abuse problem, my friends have been drilled and are ready for the worst.