Tuesday 2 April 2013

Was God an Astronaut?

It was this very question that had me standing in the airport bookshop feeling slightly embarrassed to approach the cashier with Erich von Daniken's 'Chariots of the Gods'.



 I've known about the novel for awhile now, chiefly because of the History Channel show, Ancient Aliens. The recent Ridley Scott film, Prometheus is said to be loosely based on the ideas from 'Chariots of the Gods'. The hypothesis is that in Ancient times, there is no specification here- it could be the era of Ancient Egypt or possibly the time of the Incas or Mayans, it could even be the time of the Dinosaurs or the latter part of World War One, extra-terestrials visited Earth. Now this is where it gets a bit shady. It was possible that they found early humans and used their status as "Gods" to enslave them, making them build structures like the Great Pyramids of Giza and the Nazca line. We don't quite know why they would have done this. T.hey may have needed some observatories, reminders of their time on earth, landing strips etc. According to Ancient Alien theory we don't really need to know why...just how will suffice.

The sub-theory is that not only did Aliens land on earth in 'ancient times' but the homo-sapiens that they came into contact with were not the humans we know today. In fact they looked very different and were primitive and un-thinking, this did not serve the Alien need for a mindless, subservient workforce to build their pyramids so they had to mix their DNA in their mobile, on board labs to create something altogether sublime. An alien-human hybrid that Daniken and Giorgio A Tsoukalos, consulting producer of Ancient Aliens, believe are actually our ancestors! Yes not only was our ancient world defiled by a power hungry alien race and all the structures we consider incredible acts of the human race actually given to us by these darned aliens that we were too poor and too stupid to see as anything but Gods, but we are in fact, The Aliens!



I like Ancient Alien theory not neccessarily because it makes sense or reveals as promised by the Erich von daniken book 'the mysteries of the universe', but rather because its just so entertaining. I am so bored with religions that just want to tell you that God is symbolic and 'in your heart' or 'all around you'. Ancient Alien enthusiasts believe that God really existed and he was an extra-terrestrial astronaut! His flying chariots were really spacecrafts, his garden of Eden was in reality a labratory used for artificially inseminating the primitive human beings with superior Alien sperm so that we may be the more perfect beings we are today. Heck! Even Jesus was an alien, so was Buddha, so was the Grim Reaper. Did you know that even sushi, pickled ginger and wasabi are alien inventions according to Ancient Aliens the series?

Ancient Alien theorists have possibly become just a little too swollen with pride since the series has been renewed for a fifth season. Erich von Daniken's novel, published in 1968, has an air of courage. The courage to put forward a theory that he knew many would scoff at, the bravery to say 'No I dont have all the answers but this is just a theory!' The clarity of mind to include some fuzzy photographs of archeological digs and ancient sculptures so that readers may feel like he's not just getting this from thin air. This is something that the series thoroughly lacks, for that have stopped trying to prove that ancient aliens existed but now seek only to illustrate how they lived, what they did and when they will be returning.




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